As promised, shisha with the Rara's photo. But not all, as I'm really really lazy to upload photos.
Today's Computing maths common test, its over.
Yes, whether I can do it or not, its over already, so no used pondering about it anymore.
If I did not do well, blame no one but myself.
Today,I've made a promise to myself, & I will do it !
Today's Computing maths common test, its over.
Yes, whether I can do it or not, its over already, so no used pondering about it anymore.
If I did not do well, blame no one but myself.
Today,I've made a promise to myself, & I will do it !
I've so much thoughts running thought my mind. I find no peace.
I need to voice out my feelings that I've been pressing inside me.
I hate myself on how I see and look things.
I hate myself for not knowing how to work things right, sometimes.
I hate myself for I can't concentrate and focus.
I hate myself for caring the things I should not be caring already.
I hate myself for doing the things that I should not be doing.
I hate myself for thinking so much, always.
I hate myself for always clinging on to the past.
I hate myself on venting my anger on other ppl.
I hate myself on not being myself.
But what I hate myself is right now, I can't do anything about that something.
I hate it, really. What's going on...?
If I were to given a special power, I really hope that I can crack open ppl's brain,
look inside, studied it, and see how do ppl think and work in their life.
I just wonder why some ppl just cannot, no is don't know think ?
Its so hard to trust someone. It need courage to trust. It takes time to trust.
Trust is a very big word which often ppl will misused it.
And I've see too many real life example to convince me, its enough.
Domestic problems, friends problem, school problem, work problem.
All just seems to be never-ending. Yes, they will always be coming, no matter what.
I really wish I can live my life in a easy way, like some other ppl do. Heck-care.
But I always have this feeling of uneasy, guilty and sorry. & I goddamn hate it.
I have this feeling even though I know that the ppl ard me is not worth it at all !
Really, I'm so disgusted by some ppl's fake-ness. Impressive.
Oh well, but this time, I did it. I'm not caring anymore, I've no more time to waste.
I know nobody is pefect. So I'm also trying not to see the flaws in ppl, but I think its hard.
And I think its even harder to be nice to ppl. In the end, you'll be ended up getting hurt AGAIN.
I'm hard to please, I know. But its better this way.
I wonder what will happen in few months time.. Or rather few years down the road..
Up and down, yes this is what I've been going through. No words can describe how I'm feeling.
I'm so afraid of the future. So afraid that I hope that time can stop now. Stop the clock tickling.
Its really tired to be me. Sometimes, I feel like giving up.
But my inner me just won't let me give up so easily.
I'm feeling so stress, time is not enough, always not enough for me.
Pressure is coming from everywhere.. I'm just not in a very good mood recently.
I'm sorry to whoever I've scolded. I've been trying so hard to get over it, but I realise I failed.
I really miss her. Can months faster pass and let everything be over ?
p/s : Don't ask me anymore things that I dun wish to hear.
p/s/s : I need many courage, strength and energy now !
p/s/s/s : When can I really find back the real happiness that is from the bottom of my heart ?
Ciaos.
Labels: I miss you
Withlotsoflove,
I speak L♥VE @ 8:42 PM
